Sorry I thought I was a lizard earlier.
Ian has mac and cheese all in his bed/on the wall. Either you did it or he fell asleep with a bowl in his hand and spasmed in his sleep.
Cooked or uncooked?
you threw up in someones recycling bin and left a note apologizing. how drunk do you think you were?!
I had to go to the bank to confirm purchases made on 10/31/09 because they were signed as Lady Gaga
We shared that special kind of eye contact that can only be experienced when you know one party is saying "Oh god, I fucked him in the back seat when you were in the front, didn't I."
you kept say ridiculous things then repeating them in perfect classical latin. You are onee intelligent drunk
Downstairs neighbor just asked me to tell people when they jump off the balcony next time not to land on her flowers
deryk tried to steal your screen door and i think sam and brent are duct taping lauren to the diving board.
I'm also 3/4 on the frats. Its like my goal of traveling to all 7 continents, but different somehow and a lot less morally sound.
No one would take shots with Caroline so she asked the bartender for like 20 jagerbombs and then shouted "JAGERBOMBS FOR HOMELESS ANIMALS BENEFIT" and everyone started doing them with her
walk of shame this morning involved walking through the in-home daycare that she runs while it was full of kids. judgemental little shits. on a plus, got a juice box and a graham cracker for the walk home.
My bank account got hacked so he showed up with a 6 pack wearing a superman cape to cheer me up and you question why I love him?
with the possibility that i could very easily fall in love with him and i've actually talked to my HUSBAND about it
if becoming an adult is chugging a bottle of wine in your bed and crying about your stresses while your dog watches you, sign me up
You lost me at unexpected butt stuff. Everything else I would probably do.
Randomize
