oh and i feel obligated to inform you that there will be no sexin' because it's 'lady time' for me. so this ain't a booty call.
Watching NYC prep. Doing a shot everytime one of these d-bags flips his hair. I give it 10 minutes before alcohol poisoning set in.
have u ever looked at the reflection of the water n watched the poop come out of u?
why can't you just be normal
Judging by the grocery store, everyone stocked up on frozen pizza and beer for the blizzard. If our generation ever faces doomsday, we'll go out smiling.
Not cool at all. Last night I organized my condoms by expiration date. I need to get laid.
That's what you get for drunk dialing me to ask what kind of flowers I like while outside of a strip club, after telling me you "made it rain"
Just realized ive been sitting through all of lab with a condom in my bra.
yay hump day
i figured out i could get from the downstairs bar to the upstairs bar AND grab pizza by going through the kitchen. it was the greatest discovery of my life besides the flabongo.
I think my vagina is phsycic. All day it tingled and then BAM Channing Tatums look alike fucks me like ive never been fucked in my life.
Oh damn it. Let me get a beer. I can't take anymore bad news. Hold on.
dave might be using McDoubles to pay for dances
he has gotten at least 7 lap dances out back
I'm hosting my annual valentine's day party tomorrow with every hookup I've ever had. thoughts on how it will turn out ??
There's nothing classy about a pregnant girl at a frat party...remember that.
Ok so I need a recap of last night...
YOU SPENT SIX DOLLARS AT NICKEL BEER NIGHT!!! How's that
he was wearing pj pants, thank you for not letting me go home with him
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