I wish i could sleep and get drunk at the same time...those are my 2 biggest needs right now
no i did not stop my best friend from eating out my sister...bros before hoes
I just blew my nose and little bits of weed came out.
there was naked duck duck goose
how does that even get suggested?!
after naked leap frog.... it wasn't that big of a deal
I am kinda proud of you, its like seeing my slutty baby take its first step
i put his shirt in a ziplock bag to preserve his smell
please tell me you are kidding me
I want him in the "you're a terrible idea and are probably going to get me killed by my parents, my siblings, and my boyfriend" way
Dude, sorry for live texting you my binge drinking. If you'd like me to do the same for my hangover, I can share that I just had to sit down while q-tipping my ears.
I swear with his long flowing hair and god-like body he looked like Jesus, a bong hitting Jesus
Let us do this. Tomorrow night is thirsty Thursday. Let us drink whiskey from the bottle and have men in plastic gloves inscribe permanent images of each others faces onto our buttocks.
So good!! I became real good friends with an adorable black lesbian couple from Baltimore and a man in a diaper.
I don't know if I'm more excited about getting chipotle or about getting laid
He called me in the middle of the night to ask my shoe size. Apparently big feet would make me an unsatisfactory third for the threesome.
Santa tracker drinking game, you in or what?
Make sure you wash your hands. That seagull you threw was very sick.
Randomize
