ok i said sorry. what else do you want?
100 blowjobs
have u ever looked at the reflection of the water n watched the poop come out of u?
why can't you just be normal
He gave me an orgasm with his left hand...and he's right handed. Of course he's a keeper.
I don't want end up bound and gagged in the back of a van headed for rehab. Bound and gagged OK. Just not the rehab part.
She posted on her FB that he moved out...It's like she wants me to fuck him.
Just because you put plan b in my Easter basket doesn't give you an excuse not to wear a condom.
He ended our Skype call with, "I'm going to poop and then go play my ukulele in the park."
I just want a whole pitcher of margarita and a headdress from party city and sit around and look like a fucking indian princess.
I just saw a herd of slutty loofahs run down the street...
Who's the easier target... Bandages on the knees, tramp stamp, or bra showing? Not in the mood to work for it tonight.
Would it be rude to use my vibrator? like he forfeited his right to be mad when he left me orgasmless...right?
How do you teach a grown ass men how to fuck? Why is good sex so hard to find these days?
I accidentally put Bacardi in my coffee this morning. I ain't even mad.
Woke up at 5am in an elevator... Pretty much tells you how my weekend went.
Right. Cuz nothing screams "You made it!" quite like selling your used underwear to strangers you met on the internet.
Randomize
