Texts From Last Night · Random Texts

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(353): View more from

I knocked on some strangers door, you didn't have to give me a fake hotel room number

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(609): View more from New Jersey

No touching my privates on the ride to school. Pinky swear.

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(608): View more from Wisconsin

and when he finished he started shouting "swim boys SWIM"

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(402): View more from Nebraska

my voice of reason is faarrr too drunk for me to listen.

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(618): View more from Illinois

Turns out getting tied up to two door handles and forced to repeatedly cum is actually a really good ab workout.

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(425): View more from Washington

No dude trust me, just go a strip club at their busiest hours and pick the ugliest chick. Guaranteed she blows you for under 20$, the record stands at $7.67 and a pen from Bank of America,

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(708): View more from Illinois

there seems to be a considerable amount of hair missing from my left hand. i may have lit it on fire again

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(818): View more from California

Sorry, I know you're at the airport but a gram of coke is missing so good luck with security!

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(419): View more from Ohio

She moaned the name on my fake id during sex, that or she's cheating on me with someone named Victor

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