Think the blond can even spell "shiksa"?
my ass just sighed. even my farts are tired.
WIFE SWAP. FAMILY OF MIDGETS. LIFETIME. NOW.
i've decided to use this saturday afternoon to take care of my pube situation
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm also annoyed at my horoscope for not warning me of my perils
our night together was a product of my beer goggles and jennifer aniston-like desperation.
Saying we were separated at birth, got on a ship and sailed here via onion barrel from Somalia didn't help our case at all....
I locked the porch door but I left a spare key on top of the keg on the side of the house
You said your legs stopped working and then pulled yourself around the floor with your hands.
That explains the wood chips stuck in my nipples.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
apparently i tried to facetime the drunk bus last night, that's probably why we had to walk back to campus
Drunk ass.
And if you ever tell anyone that I have emotions ill kill you
Apparently hitting a bong with your mouth half numb is hilarious but frustrating!
My knees are skinned from sitting on someone's face on concrete
he put a condom on for a handjob WTF
I thought I was drunk because I kept grabbing his arm instead of his dick
But then I realized it wasn’t his arm and that I was very lucky
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