You did that once after drunk driving from a photo shoot
That was very cool/italian of you
Which brings me to my next point, how come italians are so well adapted to drunk driving
Its about making memories worth repressing
i cant finish this easy-mac because i need it for a chaser.
Her directions to the house party: "the north star will guide you, turn left. I'm wearing the potato hat"
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I cant believe she fell for the mistletoe belt AGAIN.
4 random people called me telling me they found him sleeping in the fetal postion on a driveway 45 minutes after we lost him
So can we talk about how we all three made out with the bike taxi driver in lieu of paying him. I'm not even mad, that's resourceful. You know what married girls would have had to do? They'd have had to pay.
EARTHQUAKE STATUS DRINKING GAME
She was eating whipped cream out of a plunger at 3 am in the morning. Yet somehow she still had an elegance about her.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Dude I woke up in her bed wearing a top hat and bunny slippers and noticed one of us had pissed in bed. The last thing I wanted to ask for was a ride home
An outback commercial just played and I remembered that guy from Australia Imade out with at the Derby. Great Bachelorette Party, btw.
I thought I would be a proper lady and put my spare panties in a ziplock
I think the sex rug burn on my back is infected, can you check it out when you get home?
Why do pants feel so unnatural once you enter your own house
I'm just going to assume my unresponsive booty calls are just preparing for the women's march tomorrow
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