If she sees it and stops hooking up w/ me then you owe me
our school mascot just walked into class and threw condoms everywhere. welcome to college
When you start quoting save the last dance you need to stop drinking
4 months of living in europe has taught me the art of making a drunken stumble look like a dance move
I'm buying you potatoes, the least you could do is not ask any fucking questions and just say thank you.
I'm wearing the jeans from casino night. Tell me why I have a napkin in my pocket that says 'dont fear me'? I'm hoping it was just a coincidence.
I'd say things got weird when I started doing lines of molly in the box.
The family next to you was not pleased
I found a playlist on my ipod with only one song on it: gold digger. confused, but not surprised.
i sent him a nude and he responded 6 hours later
what did he say?
"oh m god,,, whow '!!!!nm"
I'm going to make you a sign to put on your penis to ward others off
Its a good night when you get to makeout with a cowboy
Totally just got spotted hitting the bowl by someone else hitting a bowl. We gave each other a head nod
I'm not saying I'm planning to hook up tomorrow but I'm also not saying I'm unprepared for it
Just called to hear your voice and talk about pizza.
My boobs are too perky to pay that much for a car
Randomize
