Exactly. I don't do penetration on the first date. Blowjobs however are perfectly acceptable.
I encourage the greeting beej. It determines if the dick is worth keeping around.
We had sex on my friends waterbed ..after that the whole school kept asking him if he had fun getting "sea-sick" last night.
i woke up in the fire place with a lighter in my hand. if i would have died the night would have made up for it.
At one point I was giving him a handjob and I started singing Call Me Maybe
Everybody shut up a minute, we need to discuss how much nicer the world would be if pants weren't a thing.
you left the hospital looking like the grudge, your mom and I were pushing you in a wheel chair and you yelled peace out fuckers.
Why would you waste your Ritalin on your children?
He called me saying he got nice rims for his car so now we can fuck in style
You said "this is only my eighth drink" with like 6 separate drinks
Over 14,000 people at my school and the kid I went home with last night is IN MY FUCKING LECTURE
I got in an argument over whether or not I'm a slut. I argued yes.
Learn from my mistakes. DO NOT try to steam a garment of clothing while you are wearing it. The burn is not worth the de-wrinkle.
THIS FUCKNUGGET
DOES HE EVEN REALIZE HOW MANY INCREDIBLE INSULTS I'VE WASTED ON HIM
I'VE INSULTED THE EVERLOVING SHIT OUT OF HIM AND HE CAN'T EVEN APPRECIATE IT
THE HO
Cats are difficult to handle. Also they are impossible to baptize.
He was the perfect gentleman on our first date. Took me out for candlelit dinner at a fancy restaurant, held open the door, walked me home, and made me cum three times before he got his.
Randomize
