You know, as long as there were ice cream breaks, I would totally eat chips for a living.
I think dad's getting high again. His last google search was "awesome ping pong shit."
The worse part is i sent a text at like three that said i was getting head... Now i have no idea who's mouth has been on my dick
just watched the video of me leading you with a trail of french fries.
He tried to write down the address for the cab on half a bagel.
So puking trix and chicken wings is horrible but atleast we got free drinks for taking the trash out at the bar we are really movin up in the world
Empowerment dancing to Touch Me in the Morning by Diana Ross. Handling this breakup SO well.
What goes on in that head of yours?
Gay sex, for the most part. Why?
Do you know how hard it is to maintain a conversation with someone who just told you they put their cat in the fridge on purpose?
I think your dad took our porno
Eating chips and sending nudes. This is my life.
Leave it to me to sleep w a guy who gets poison ivy on his dick
I wish I could open myself up and check on my liver. Make sure it's hanging on. Ya know?
I imagine you as a cat holding your burrito with two paws and cutely eating it
Don't do it. It's 9 am on a Monday morning and I'm hungover. I can't deal with tears right now.
Randomize
