I'd be more interested in girls if they were more interested in anal.
I wish there was a "friends who have gained the most weight since high school" filter on facebook for when I am feeling fat.
she thought the capital of kansas was topanga.
ah. the first shower back home is like a baptism from the sins of the past year
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Glad we went casual last night, made my 1pm walk of shame through Walmart a little less obvious
Call me when your ready for an explanation about the ham in your vagina.
i accidentally sent all my draft messages..how do i do damage control for the multiple "fuck me now" type msgs sent at ten am?
Do to my newly discovered condition I'm having to resort to emergency beat sessions to avoid the temptation to text girls I know are easy slams.
It's official. I'm gonna fuck hot art class guy. But this won't be like hot Samsung guy. I'm gonna make sure I follow through this time.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I just heard your voicemail. Glad you like my dick and think I'm cool
I truly wish I could say I pulled my groin straddling our cab driver but unfortunately I cannot
Single lady's Saturday night: eat doritos, masturbate, eat more doritos. Do shot of Jager. Repeat until desired result is achieved.
Can't really tell your Mom you are moody due to dick deprivation.
Is it immoral to trade sex for the use of his laundry room?
Either im seeing the northern lightgs, someone is having a rave, or im on acid.. Im most likely on acid
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