Honestly there's alot of things I'm confused about the only thing I know for certain about last night is that I ate pizza
Why on earth are you answering my texts promptly? Thought for certain you'd be caught up in some ridiculous orgy by this time.
I'm that good.
What do you think she thinks of us?
I think she thinks we're whores... but ya I think she likes us
The night started going downhill when I set my foot on fire.
I kindof just wanted to go downstairs and let his dad know how good his son was at sex
It was that same situation where "cuddling on the floor" was actually just code for "rough shameful hate sex" hahaha.
So basically, I've just woken up in another random bed and I go to get my pants and he's wearing them. Like my underwear is in them... What the fuck is wrong with my life?
I mean, on what planet are nipples suppose to look like that?
Why were you not born a dude?
Because god wanted to level the playing field
Being the hot sister definately has advantages, I'm pretty sure I ruined her engagement
You know you threw a brownie at my head last night. And said you did it to defend the turtles honer....
Dude, he wouldn't have sex with me during halftime cause we were rooting for different teams and that would be "bad juju", I had to settle for 69.
in retrospect i think my mom tried to raise me gay
He flew in from NY last night. We had sex in the back of my car in the airport parking lot and then he fed me fresh Babka (from Breads Bakery) as I drove him home. I can't decide if I love him or Babka more.
He stopped mid sex to say he was sorry that he couldn't make us work.continued. Stopped again to ask if it was crazy that he loved me.
That is not what no strings attached sex is about.
Randomize
