I would do horrible things to your vagina.
Prove it.
I just heard a girl say "We can't go that way, it is a one way street." She was on foot...Nothing worse than girl from the midwest that move to NY to "live out their dream" -the dream of living in a rat and roach infested 200sqft for $2k a month, and get fucked by some recent Ithaca college frat grad...
i got us presents. or arrested. we shall see!
It was unlikely that the relationship was going to end with anything other than antibiotics.
stumble upon led me to how to make wine in prison, followed by wedding dresses. it knows my life too well
i just saw that homeless guy who dresses like the cat in the hat at the liquor store. i guess he got enough change to have a good weekend. oh the places he'll go
I'm lonelier than Tom Hanks in Cast Away, right meow. Ready to make this bong my Wilson.
Now back to adults eating hotdogs.
I met a pornstar at his bachelor party and signed his shirt giving him wedding advice
He didn't have much of a personality. But I had like 100 orgasms, so that's cool.
PS if you want to hear something hilarious as my little sister was showing me her engagement ring I open a Snapchat from R and it's literally a dick pic. Very different points in our life
he told me he wanted me to go see his cat. apparently i was more interested in playing with his cat then having sex.
Found my paycheck. It was in the freezer
Hey Girl, we got home safe!
I know, I drove you
Can’t. Tonight’s a netflix and dick night
Randomize
