I just spent my lunch hour driving around campus yelling "TRADE LIVES WITH ME!" to all the freshmen moving in
So high. I just took a picture of my chewed gum so I can remember to paint a picture of it as a cloud later.
The police scanner is talking about you again....
Please don't tell me I was shouting "I'm bleeding from my vagina" in front of my ex-boyfriend and his new girlfriend.
Its like they don't get that I only talk to them before homecoming, thanksgiving, or any other time I go home. I love highschool girls.
I'd really appreciate it if we could dress up as pilgrims and indians for the thanksgiving eve bar crawl
She was like the Rudy of blow jobs... SO much effort into it
I like to think of it as a lesbian feast.
Actually, considering the facts that I am wearing a duct tape dress and eating a gas station quesadilla, I am pretty good.
i think i swapped my keys for drugs last night
I don't know bro. If a girl makes you cum hard enough that you pull a back muscle, she might be the perfect one to call for a massage on said muscle.
Costco (TM). Making alcoholism affordable!
From what I remember I had fun, until I threw up, and lost my shoes..
What a way to start the day. Staring at penis for 3 hours
It's pretty much my favorite thing ever
I just saw a guy faceplant off a unicycle while holding a saxophone, while his buddy riding another unicycle and sporting a flute rode by laughing
Only at UConn...
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