I fell asleep with crest white strips on and ate one...
sunday morning discovery: something purple, smelly, and sticky my hair. any suggestions?
Its 11am everyones wasted wearing sombreros and eating fresh produce..cesar chavez would be very proud
Just wana tell you im wearing assless jorts tonight. Ive been waiting my whole life for this.
I wonder if you can snort coke upside down
This will be amazing. Plus he's going to do a line of cocaine off of the other guy's ass.
I just went to pick up my pigeon from your house. You should be getting a picture soon
One reason I feel like garbage: Kraft single wine shots
Haha, oh man. I'm awake now. Slept in my headdress.
The only way to make beer can wizard staffs any better is to sew your own wizards robe and hat to go along with it. welcome to tuesday nights at my new apartment
Pizza toast. It's like pizza but on toast. BC we are broke. OMG its so good.
You would never do this sober.
he kept opening the car door while we were ON THE HIGHWAY and insisting he could walk. next time i drive my boss home at 3am i'm putting the child lock on
I want your cock.
All we are is dust in the wiiiiiiinnnnnnnnnnd
We go out, we get drunk, we watch Star Wars, we pass out. What's wrong with this tradition?
I've faked every orgasm I've ever had, I think I can fake being sick for 8 hours.
Randomize
