By the way, your roommate is right. His penis is much bigger than yours.
I don't think there's a better bc pill reminder then when teen mom comes on
Fuck it dude, we gotta bounce before she starts talking about her steve irwin conspiracy
Just had to pull out another loan to pay for that public drunkenness citation. I am so ready to graduate.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
apparently the last bar didn't like my halloween costume with syringes filled with whiskey
I feel like fucking him is something we all do but don't want to admit to. like masturbating or peeing in the shower
All I'm saying is that your next houseguest had better not barge in on me in the shower demanding I wash the stolen dye from his hair. I'm not doing that a second time.
I've got my wine, though it wasnt very good so I threw a sour patch kid in it
I just want to like fall into a pit of hot wings beside a keg of yingling and eat my way to freedom
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I can't wait to see you again...not a euphemism, just really looking forward to seeing you. Wanting to fuck you as often as possible just seems implied at this point.
Just had to kick my 26 yr old boyfriend out of my bed before getting the kids up for school. Have I mentioned being 41 doesn't suck as much as all the hype.
Sometimes I just want to kiss you without you pulling ur cock out and waving it at me
Was the guy in the cowboy hat kinda hot or have I just not had sex in a really long time?
Where you at? Come home and endure this shit show called "The Second Presidential Debate".
I'm laying in bed cuddling with my teddy bear and eating waffles. I need a fucking boyfriend
Randomize