therell be strippers and coke right?
no strippers. just coke.
i hate this fuckin recession
He could be your dad!
We discussed that right before he asked for my number
They had miseltoe over the keg.... thats cheating
I had a dream last night that I had sex with Abe Lincoln. I must stop watching the History Channel before I go to bed.
Just tried on my bathing suit for the first time this year. Had to drink a beer to numb the pain.
She had her laptop open and there was microsoft word opend and all was written was "no italianoo"
I woke up this morning with a wristband and I thought I went to the hospital last night I actually went ice skating instead
my boss just accepted "because it's 4/20" as a legitimate reason to take Friday off
He made me sneak beer in the diaper bag... guess who is winning 2012 parents of the year
Your vase full of piss was still at his house and he still doesn't know.
Ugh a 13 year old just asked me why people drink, I had to explain it without making it sound good. I need a drink.
I woke up the whole house screaming I need my shorts they found me in the kitchen with a bag of strawberries naked
nobody put me to bed and I ended up peeing on a tree and got written up
I didn’t not spend thanksgiving morning making out with him in a diner parking lot
I need weed and if he's hot, maybe he can supply me with sex too.
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