do girls know yet that the best boners are in the morning?
just had sex with a midget and didnt wrap it... were totally gonna have a tv show :)
Playing the biology drinking game in my 8am. Drink everytime he says species or organism. I love st. Patricks day
No one showed up yet so I smoked 4:20 on chatroulette with a naked chick..
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
there was some random girl that nobody really knew, standing in the corner trying to shave her armpits with a plastic butter knife.
Just curious... Do you still have the cocks bracelet? You know, the one we pass around to whoevers been the biggest slut recently?
I called him daddy. To his face. Somewhat sober. What more could I do?
I'm riding shot gun after Shawn took a dump in a happy meal box because we were making record time.
Quick! What do I wear on a 4 hour road trip with an older guy in the army I had pantomime sex with in a hotel a few months ago?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Full contact beer pong was definitely not my best idea.
I gave you a piece of bread to sober you up. You wiped your face off with it and then gave it back to me.
I just picked up a hitchhiker so karma will be on our side this weekend. Hahahahahaha
No.
Maybe if he'd step up his game and get a real job instead of donating plasma and trying to grow pot then you wouldn't feel compelled to write prisoners in Oregon.
Can we be gay Bert and Ernie for Halloween?
You threw him in the dryer?
He went in of his own accord. Mumbled something about experiencing the blossoming of popcorn.
Randomize