Hurry. And bring back up. SHE WON'T STOP TALKING.
a pedometer??? no beatles?Steve jobs just took a dump in CA and it landed on my heart
I left when they started reinacting what appeared to be a jerry springer episode
i just uploaded pictures of my nephew, and you & d puking in the same toilet. i think i should keep them in the same album. show my nephew what he has to look forward to.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I just decorated my birth control case with Lisa Frank stickers. If that doesn't scream 'I'm not ready for babies' I don't know what does.
Well, it was good.. One step forward for my vaj.. One giant leap backwards for my integrity.
It's like getting ready for my vaginas own execution
He went to WalMart with $30 and came back with a watch, a basketball and an engagement ring.
Hope you don't mind if I never tell my family about you.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Some drunk guy thought my knee scooter was the sexiest thing he's ever seen. He then proceeded to ask me about duck hunting and decoys...
Drinking a bawls. If I'm dead when you get home, yes, they are poisoned.
idk about you, but when i sext i just hit em with the "yo lets bang" text
You told him about your cats? I told his friend to put his dick in my mouth, and you talked about cats!?
How is it that 364 days a year I'm the adult, but on Halloween you completely forget how to have fun and become my grandma?
He's making me do the dishes for the next month and half because I shit in the bath tub...
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