If that was your dad, he is hot
Is it weird i consider You Sexy Thing our song?
the lighter is IN the bong. I don't know what to do
that trick or treat candy bucket that we used to collect beer money last night was very helpful when I vomited in it this morning
I was just reelected president of justgotlaidsylvania
Omg. The nephews found my stripper pole. The scary part is theyre good at it.
He's going to be my graduation present to myself.
Ski vacations are for hooking up with randoms. It's like I don't even know you
I have a half pound of weed, a case of beer, 8 frozen pizzas and a hard dick. You have a high tech super-bong and a chest of sex toys. That's our vacation week right there.
In local news "Man Stabbed With Golf Club" next person who tells me this is a safe place to live gets punched...
If I die here, tell my vagina and my cats that I'm sorry.
I woke up in a beaver hat and contruction vest.. I need answers.
The best part about theater chicks is nothing is too cliche or out of line. I just fucked her Braveheart style in my entry way while saying goodbye.
Ever find a porn video so groundbreaking you mentally cancel all your Dick Appointments for the week?
Why can't he see that I don't want a slow getting to know you period? I just want to bone. NOW.
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