I hate this i feel like im wasting my youth here. I should be off hooking up with boys around the world and having awkward next morning convos in different languages!!
im a genious. moved my bed and mirror so i can watch the game while Fucking
Vodka @ 9pm. Library. Nothing can go wrong, I promise.
once you started introducing yourself as "running-bear" i knew you were beyond fucked up
Why do the people I hook up with still exist after we're done?
I forgot if I was chewing my gum or my tongue
I vote for a trading skills night. You teach me to juggle, I'll teach you knife fighting, and we'll both learn banjo
This is the most boring acid ever. I feel like a child. But thats okay, I've been a child before, its nothing new.
Today has been like a snow day for your boobs. No rules, just doing whatever they want.
Depending on which video of him streaking you watch, you can see me passed out in the front row.
my friend was passed out in the bathroom so I threw up in the coffee maker, not the pot the water reservoir that kind of drunk.
I left my panties in the microwave for too long and they caught on fire
You screamed "i promise ill stop blowing your brother" in the middle of a packed restaurant at 1pm. We should maybe rethink our relationship.
You know youre getting old when you I.D. the person trying to take you home to be sure they're over 25. Help me.
Officially not baby mama #3. Celebration is in order.
Randomize
