Today at work while talking to my co-worker we both realized at the same time that last year I had a one night stand with his roommate and he was in the living room drinking coffee when I did the walk of shame. YAY.
it was worse than that time i tried giving evan head 4 days post nose job.
Is it bad that when my prof gave examples of "stalking" behavior, I either have done or would do most of them?
I was to drunk to drive all the way up there, so we just had rough phone sex instead
yeah except there is a correlation between drinking moonshine and going blind, which kind of concerns me
Also I spent like 2 hours on the hubble/nasa website sunday night looking at pictures of outer space and cried my face off at how beautiful and complex it is. What's wrong with me?!
There are twenty thousand men on this campus, please have sex with someone who isn't my drug dealer
New one-upper goal: I have to shit off the side of a moving train then jump off
It's just unfortunate. She's a 28 year old woman who looks as if a pelican and ET had a baby. With braces.
I may have played more drinking games with my family this last week than all of freshman year...
Dude, my ex girlfriend showed up, bought me a tequila shot, made out with me and then disappeared into the night. Then her current girlfriend saw, so she came over and slapped me and then I made out with her too
This was before halftime
I RUINED A LESBIAN RELATIONSHIP BEFORE HALFTIME
steve's beating me 4-2 in our "sexually confusing straight people" competition. steve is a wizard. this is not a drill.
learned the hard way that breakfast jack daniels is a lot stronger than lunch or dinner jack daniels.
I TAUGHT HER CAT TO SIT. CATS DON'T FUCKING SIT ON COMMAND. BUT THIS ONE DID!
It's basically my crowning achievement.
Is it just me or did we have a heart to heart talk while you were naked last night?
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