Ducking stuck downtown...all the fuxkig roads are blixkded
Hawaiian shirts and no dignity
We are always on the same wavelength...kinda eerie.
He has been begging me for a Bj but doesnt want to get mono
How is he gunna get mono? is he gunna suck on his dick after you?
Then I realized I was alone sitting on the bathroom floor brushing my teeth at 2am laughing to myself.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Im not spending 10 to get hit on by potential transexuals even if they are cuter than most of the girls I dated.
Would it be safe to assume you're the one that left my front door wide open and left yourself a trail of jaeger drops to find your way back?
after last night my drinking related hospital bracelet collection is up to 13
Wanna hang out, and by hang out I mean go get plan B... and maybe lunch, but mostly plan b
This guys mom bought us a 24 pack and drove me and 8 others to a frat house... Hello moms weekend.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Chick last night said she only gets off if she rubs her childhood blanket her parents gave her during sex
See, thats where im at with my life, welcome to the slut yaht we will be cruising comfortably all summer at an extremely drunken relaxing pace S.S. Slut Bucket
Your whole purpose in life is to just float around and satisfy lonely women and also join lesbian couples in threesomes.
I drank half a bottle of wine while watching the Olympics opening ceremonies. I catcalled at handsome athletes. Stop me.
Girl this is ridiculous I told my self that I would stop having sex in stairwells yet it keeps happening
Now that mom and dad sold the camper, do you think it's okay to talk about all the sex I had in it?
Randomize