Loo but I'm already drunk TINIGHT! CAPS ATTACK
Dan just whipped out his wang to piss in a milk jug! Hello weekend.
he was wearing sponge bob boxers. Guess how long he lasted.
In an effort to go green, I just used rainwater to fill my bong.
Was finally able to jerk off without the motion giving me a migraine. Think my hangover's getting better.
he's got a countert top full of yard sale blenders so id say maragita wednesdays is a go.
My knee is bleeding. This cheeseburger is the 3rd thing I made out with today and I think I got a job with the ducks. Catalina is poppin
Also, I don't remember opening my gifts from my family. It was cool when I woke up with a new ihome.
Scratch one off the douchebag bucket list. Just saw a guy in a sesame street tshirt and a tap out hat. Didn't get the memo that big bird's trying to get into mma.
All I wanted was a hug. You dirty, dirty whore.
do you remember your solution to not spill your drinks last night? .. Shots, that way you wouldnt have time to spill them. i love your drunken logic haha
I love that you'd blow off your high school reunion to get shit faced in an aquarium with us
Um. We all know how I feel about sea life
Pretty sure we ruined a bachelorettes life last night
Did you at least know who's jizz it was?
That is questionable.
Officially hit an ultimate low today. I was so hung-over I threw up on the ground in front of the jousting display in the London tower. But on a positive note, Brits are very understanding when you vomit on their history.
Randomize
