Can I have the boy from 16 and pregnant's next baby???
he poured tabasco sauce in my vag.. I'm still having a hard time going to the bathroom.
I don't know what's more sad having a rewards account at a liquor store or already racking up 273 dollar points since january
I think you blew it when you asked her "Do you look good naked too, Or is it just the bra?"
guess who's eating a vending machine cheese danish, has no panties on, and is still the classiest bitch at this bus stop?
He's bringing condoms over for me in case we "bone".... the fact he calls it boning is not a great start.
Ok that kid was ether gay or 12 with a beard.
Did you really just text me at 6:35 in the morning asking where the condoms were? I moved out a year ago.
Don't worry that pussy is fresh, I'd brush my teeth with it.
What can I say, I'm a giver.
Smoking up the homeless at 3am does not make you a humanitarian.
thats because you have standards... and i have a thing for guys that give me free drugs.
You were running around yelling "BUKAKE!" and squirting people with a shampoo bottle you found. Total shitshow.
When she sees your dick for the first time, tell her it glows blue when orcs are close
When cunnilingus is one of the first 25 words you say to someone there's a problem
#reasonsyoushouldnthaveatinder
I didn't tell that thing I wasn't coming over. Whoops
You know you haven't dated in a while when you call boys "that thing" and call dates "a boy type thing."
Randomize
