no, no I am DEF NOT pregnant. typo. sorry, wanted to talk about us...
i am not above fucking your little sister on your bed
We uncovered another pile of vomit after you left. And i am not talking about the one in the vase
I could get a dump truck for 1000. Think of the possibilities.
Maybe its all the xanax she takes but she literally has NO shame
We left live chickens on the basement slip n slide. Good luck finding your car keys
I want to meet new people and vomit on their things instead\n
Need help. Super baked. Stuck on couch. Dying of thirst. Bring paint thinner or something to pry me off. Only thumbs and neck work.
My goal is to go an entire semester without cocaine. That's an adult goal right?
I don't know man, I have to ask my girlfriend if I can borrow my balls from her purse.
im so hung over everytime my dog barks the sound vibration makes my whole body hurt
Well start with a list of things you don't want to do... Like maybe 1) I don't want join Isis. That's a good start.
I've only fucked to 2 Fleetwood Mac songs, that must be why my life feels so empty.
Couch. On fire.
I will not abuse the gift that was given to me
You were given a vagina and you abuse that pretty hard
Randomize
