I cockslap morals
I really love her but I don't think I can go the rest of my life without anal.
what date should I let him know how fucked up I am?
Thank god i puked near the cancer center. makes me look like a chemo patient
I was told to ask you about memoirs of a geisha.
That is correct. I did in fact somehow pass out in the tanning booth for over an hour. And yes the attendant did have to open it up and shake me awake.
I transported a midget tonight. He got beat up by another, midgetier midget. Is it bad that this is what makes me feel compassion after 15 years of being a paramedic?
Midgetier?
Smaller, yet meaner.
Found my wallet. It was under my dresser with a note that said "good job you found me". Drunk me is an ass.
I am incapable of maintaining a guy's interest in me. It's like erectile dysfunction but with feelings
I don't have time to shower before my passport photos...your cum is all over my hair...that's with me for 10 years now
One eye has cum in it and the other has sunscreen
summertime
Opened my notebook to coke all over the pages. So, if that's any indication on how this weekend went.
YOU HAVE TO STOP TELLING BARTENDERS WE DON'T HAVE MORAL STANDARDS
Like I fucked him in the shower at 3 am when I had classes all day the next day so he can't say I'm not dedicated
Nothing personal but yes I would be suspicious If I saw 3 guys and 2 girls in the same bathroom stall together
Randomize
