Omg. Never. Take a laxative the day you are going on. A date.
Sundresses, hats, and big glasses. That is the greatest trick the devil ever taught women.
i havent had this much fun since the last time i farted and it created a boner.
Cleveland boys shit in their own pumpkins in their own living room. Got pictures to prove it.
Taking the airport shuttle drunk should not happen this often in my life.
You were sitting in the tub, clothed, squirting my KY all over yourself. You said "it's warm." then passed out.
The guy I woke up with is wearing the same nailpolish as me...I need to stop drinking
I'm going for high school drunk, you've got 15 minutes to get here.
I sat on my couch last night watching What Women Want, eating ice cream, and sobbing "why doesn't she like me?" Why was I born a man?
I am thinking about buying a decorative chest for all our sex stuff....
She ordered an O'douls. That was the end of that date
Ok. As long as I can keep Kevin contained to the room I'll be ok. If not u might have a naked puking Kevin at ur door
It's cool bro. The video I have of you drunk trying to fix it with the sonic screwdriver was worth it.
...blackout vacation is awesome. Where did you end up? I think i'm in Miami.
Hospital.
I. Am. Not. Tattooing. My. Penis.
Randomize
