my dad wants uyo to call him right now...reverse drunk dialing
I'll trade you a raw potato for some vodka
what do people who dont have blackberrys do while they poop?
We just used hot candle wax from our joint lighting candle to make a bunch of new small ones how stoned are we
we were so high we made up an elaborate backstory because we were paranoid about going into the wig shop w/o being serious wig shoppers
I don't plan to be alive for 2010 so ima say this 12 hours early. Happy New Year bitches
she danced around my room naked waving around the gold trojan magnum condoms singing "i have the golden ticket."
little did she know i was taping her the whole time.
He' s half Black and half Italian, I finally asked...this penis maybe one for the records.
You broke into someone's house and stole a pan of lasagna.
He didn't dress up but kept finding random pieces of costumes on the floor at each club. He was an 80s hair band warrior at the end of the night.
Getting drunk and falling down, isnt the best way to describe your hobbies, to your new co-workers.
Yes. That was the exact moment of my conscience clicking into instant high alert.
The house hit rave levels when La Bamba came on which confuses me because I live in white suburban Canada
PARA BAILAR LA BAMBA ASSHOLES
Oh, btw, UPS might come by. Drunk me ordered us $75 worth of gummy airhead starburst type candies. Whatever it is, it'll be delicious.
Dude they are making elephants out of dollar bills. I'm way too high for this
Randomize
