Would it be quicker to bike the freeway home?
grab my backpack.....its in the fridge
I just bedazzled my weight watchers points calculator. You can tell I'm gay.
also. he gave me a foot massage during 69ing when i got a cramp. he's a winner.
rethinking that breast reduction surgery... i'm tired of drunkenly explaining the scars to guys who don't really give a shit
We did naked snow angels in 14 degree weather, you can't tell me you had more liquor at that party
Just so you know swallowing does not help chest colds. Your Phd can suck my dick
just did a beer bong in the shower while i was taking an actual shower its officially football time
I'm in a pile of cheezits at an unfamiliar location watching dateline on tlc. Stage an intervention.
One guy got his nose broke and was playing with it. Then another guy was playing beer pong off his horse.
I wouldn't know what to do. You never really mentally prepare for a cactus getting thrown at your face.
I swear she is the Mary Poppins of drugs
Are you ok?!
I assume I've stopped bleeding because I haven't passed out, but can't verify currently.
i think the people from taco bell are onto us. they had my order ready today at 3am BEFORE I even got there.
I love when Facebook suggests people I may know. Well, yeah, I know him. He's my drug dealer. Pretty sure I want to keep that relationship strictly professional.
Randomize
