My face is bruised from laying on the concrete. NO MORE VODKA!
Ya well my good-girl image was pretty much blown when he found out I'm going to jail soon.
so some random man just messaged me on facebook "tig ol bitties" should i be concerned?
A three fingered guy just showed up with fireworks and bourbon, tonight will be entertaining.
puking in a sink with a garbage disposal Fucking. Rules. It's like you're punishing your puke when you're done.
On a toatally unrelated note, I see music in my hair
While looking for socks, I found my mothers sex toy box. Dear god I finally understand where my kinkiness comes from.
you started petting my head and said "there there, majestical unicorn. it won't be long before we get you back to neverland."
Everything I own smells like cigarettes and victory right now. The smell is never coming out.
He saw one of my bras on the floor and said "damn you could eat soup out of this"
Dude we gotta go back to your cabin. left glenn. he's calling me crying and still drunk
I burned myself with a joint twice in one sitting I have to say that's a new record for the least number of times I have hurt myself while smoking.
I need you there. I need someone to glance at when other people inevitably annoy me.
He surprised me with a puppy tail butt plug in his ass and wants me to fuck him
Became friends with a girl at work today until I realized we have the same taste in men. And I thought only I liked red-bearded fat men
Randomize
