And he showed us your test. You wrote what is this shit and scribbled on it? Nice 3%..
Lost is over, my longest committed relationship is coming to an end.
idk if you're aware of this...but we could potentially have the greatest hate sex...ever.
just got double teamed by two guys I will be on beach patrol with this summer. six months until the season starts and I'm already 'that girl.'
shattered his nose in 8 pieces. Blaming it on the dog. I feel more guilty about ruining the dog's good name than I do about ruining his nose.
Update: we are pushing the start of day drinking back from 9 am to 10 am. Minor delay.
I knew I was rolling hard when I realized I had been rubbing the couch for an hour
You should never talk to him again. Unless its you knocking on the door and punching his dick.
She found my wedding ring, sallowed it and wished me good luck explaining it to my wife before walking out. Now what?
when he pulled his cock out I told him he'd brought a knife to a sword fight
do you think this outfit says "I maintained my dignity this weekend"?
Ugh. I guess I'm crying loudly or something. My mom just came in and gave me milk, chocolate, a Xanax, and her weed "for the break up blues". Her ways of affection are so odd.
Just had sex to Jesse & the Rippers. Can check that one off the bucket list.
Also I am throwing a blaZer over what I wore to bed and calling it an outfit.
I was watchin a porno and I sware I saw that dude at the bar at applebees the other night
Randomize
