I masturbated on the webcams with my bf yesterday then typed without washing my hands first... then my roommate used my laptop it was pretty priceless
you are hot. that is all.
who is this?
the delivery driver from silvermine.
when I woke up she was standing in the living room with a bottle of scotch because she is "allergic to hangovers"
can't wait for January to be Over so I don't have to see all the fat resolutionists working out.
She wouldn't go home with me cause I forgot her name. I didn't realize it would matter after she danced with her vagina on my face
I keep having to talk dad out of putting tequila in the milkshakes.
you kept telling us that in dog beers you only had one
I'm just sayin' man be careful, that chick has castration written all over her.
My husband has seen you naked more times this week than me. I don't consider it a bad thing since you keep bringing the booze to our house. And because my tits are bigger.
Should I take a fireball shot or brush my teeth?
He's been pretending to be gay for 3 months in order to get free weed.
Honestly at least you're not debating on whether or not you need to take plan b. But I can't because I spent all my money on pizza.
I had to say goodbye to one of my fuck buddies last night. He's voting for Trump, we shouldn't be doing it anyways.
It was a fun night! I woke up with a boyfriend, again....
I promised to leave my panties on but I didn't promise to not have sex
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