Being alone has allowed me to flourish into a complete weirdo
I don't know if it's her mysterious past or atrocious grammar, but I think I'm in love.
He's a navy seal. He can stick it anywhere he wants.
i can barely draw a stick figure let alone shave a heart into my pubes
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
How many times can I tell him I wasnt expecting sex before he realizes I'm just too lazy to shave all the time?
He brought Stephanie home from the black light party. Apparently he has night vision beer goggles
You want to move to a city because of their promotional beer pricing
So?
This is why you shouldn't make decisions
I want him to be my next love. So I'm taking it slow
As in ill only blow him next week
This has been the most pleasant arrest experience I've ever had.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Well see how he likes it when I randomly start crying and saying my dads name during sex I WILL RUIN ALL HIS FUTURE BONERS
I woke up to him yelling "WHO SLEEPS WITH A BEER IN THEIR HAND?!?" this of course, startled me awake and made me spill the aforementioned beer. So I guess the a answer is- not this girl, not anymore. Asshole
Drunk sperm are not productive sperm.
Hey so I got my period
Thank god I wasn't ready to deal with sober you for 9 months
in the middle of telling this chick to sober up i was shotgunning beers. im gonna be ab awsome nurse.
wait you fucked a guy who wears k-swiss? seriously?
I know, im living my 7th grade dream
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