my new favorite insult= "thundercunt"
If i have to listen to his problems about his girlfriend, he should at least let me suck his cock.
you decided to have a spaghetti fight but then you got greedy and decided to eat it all.
I had a guy present me his prison release form this morning as id
incase your class ends early, there are three naked guys in our room. but don't get too excited, they're all gay.
So, I found out he was eating a jolly rancher while eating me out.. Hence the yeast infection.
Do you think the neighbors will know I was the one giving out the penis shaped lollipops to the children?
dude throwing a golf cart off a pier is harder than it seems!
I hope our bodies realize that workaholics starts tomorrow and will be well enough to handle the hell we are going to put them through. amen.
You can't play that off as role play thing. You held my hips and kept yelling "put a baby in me!" That shit ain't cool.
Less than a month to graduation and I'm still blacking out on the reg tonguing down the closest breathing organism preferably with a penis but I'm flexible, and still havent figured out how to be functional on Fridays. WHY don't they teach us valuable shit at this institution!?
Were you citizens arresting people again last night?
I rewarded myself with Taco Bell tonight for going a full week without punching my roommates in the face or wishing bodily harm on them.
YOUR MANICOTTI IS FULL OF LIES
Sorry i meant to send that to my mom
Yeah. We're taking this fuck buddy relationship to the next level. Sober weekday sex.
Randomize