OKAY SO WHENEVER I SEE AN UGLY COUPLE I ALWAYS WONDER WHAT THEY SAY TO EACH OTHER IN BED. creepy?
nothing as in nothinggggg kills the mood for me is when a girl with 4 cm nipple hair
Her best friend sent her a random hate text and the song they played at her father's funeral came on the radio. I just got cock blocked by the universe
successfully started a charcoal grill with 2 shots of everclear and some aluminum foil. i never wanna leave here
I just had some guy offer to eat me out on my lunch break... I think single life is getting better everyday
We are keeping it ultra classy drinking 40s and playing croquet with 90s rap blasting in the back ground
Felt like shit, jerked off, felt ten times better. Being a guy rules. It's like I got all the demons out in 5 minutes.
How many drinks/blunt hits do you think I could get if I wore an "it's my birthday" shirt
Dad danced with a girl half his age and her boyfriend just sat at the bar and waited for dad to be done. I bought pity nachos.
Was just trying to have a normal "I fucked you without a condom" adult conversation and she flipped
I was in the rappers prayer circle. Then they're blunt circle
the roommate is literally cooking green eggs n ham, and I'm too hungover to see straight. Dr Seuss nightmare.
I just realized I have a habit of pre gaming for therapy visits. Problem?
We'll discuss it when you get here
I’m pretty sure I have teeth marks on my neck
My boyfriend's mom is the manager of Wendy's. The same one I took a pregnancy test in.
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