he's 24. he finally texted me instead of using facebook chat. baby steps.
wait a second... your telling me you want me to take you to the bank at 10 on a tuesday so you can buy a blow up pool and fill it with beer?
yes... and buy you lunch
her cat watched me eat her out... I would use the alternate term for both of those things but it's too weird.
She played chubby bunny with our cocks.. She got 4
Rent Disney Oceans. Smoke a bowl. Fast forward to the seal section. Then call me.
Wanna hang out, and by hang out I mean go get plan B... and maybe lunch, but mostly plan b
just go where the car takes you. fingers crossed its here with breakfast.
Nope. Too hot. We just sat in my tub with cold water spraying on us drinking coronas. This summer heat is killing my libido slowly
So my mom wants me to come swim with dolphins with my little sisters in October. I'm not sure how to tell her I saw a "when dolphins attack" special when I was rolling and am now terrified of them.
I'm not entirely sure how getting 'house drunk' turned into us getting trashed, being serenaded by karaoke and going out. But it needs to happen again.
I tried to light my cup as a bong. I'm done drinking
Naked. naked and bneed help.
I got propositioned to get involved with an engaged couple. I told them I didn't think my married couple would like me to see other couples...
I threw up in my brother's Easter basket
Want ramen today?
I need a salad
SALAD DOESNT WARM YOUR HEART AND BELLY
Randomize