dude if Megan calls say you Sis was house sitting for me yesterday , she f'n found dana's panties
I will give you vagina for bag of have'a corn chips.
Last night drunk me texted a sure to be hungover me my class schedule and locations for today. I'm like a mom preparing her child for the first day of school
obviously you don't know the college version of myself. if there's something i'm ALWAYS willing to put up for it's alcohol.
I just realized I'm not towing a trailer. I thought this whole drive home I was towing a trailer. Wow too high
i'm drinking margaritas from a pouch...really dont think i'm in the position to judge anyone...
At what point during this road trip should I let them know I've been drinking in the backseat the whole time and can't take my turn driving?
Wtf. I just got invited to a threeway bj session in the bathroom at boiler. Lmao
Apparently I tried to convince him to sleep with me by showing him that I could do dips....
We shall study the pictures later and see if his penis is worth my time.
Even though he had a fractured vertebrae, the sex was still phenomenal. Better than normal actually. I hope the vertabrae never heals.
When Vanessa's kindergarten teacher called me in because she was caught with her hand down some boys pants in the bathroom, I knew you babysat last week.
He ate shrooms at 9:30, said, "see you later," and left. I am alone on New Years.
Hey sorry about last night. can I come pick up my tooth?
Bacardi 151 is like a past nightmare I'm still curious about
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