i've decided that sluttiness is like a disease, it can lay dormant in you for years and then one day you go to college and with all the booze and drugs and boys and time on your hands symptoms begin to show then one day BAM you're a huge slut. it's like how izzie had skin cancer and it grew into brain cancer.
i bet jesus would rush if he went to usc
I'm so fucking pissed that I wasted my shooting star wish on him and his little penis.
just woke up with an anonymous loaf of bred in my bed and a piece in my mouth. this says alot about my life.
susan atkins died, charles manson's lady
dont cry, there are other serial killers to crush on.
the last thing i remember was trying to convince him to call over his girlfriend so we could have a threesome
He's fat, has man boobs, and is uncircumsized. I feel like I won the last woman on earth prize.
The guy that just projectile vomited over the balcony is now going down to find the pill he just puked up. He said he wasn't about to waste $15.
and i'm pretty sure he drank the lava lamp
Did I send you an asleep facebook message about the upcoming football season titled 'BRILLIANT' at 4:45 this morning?
Question. There's no better feeling than clean shaven balls. Do girls get that too?
Is it a bad thing for a seven year old to call one an alcoholic? Asking for a friend..
Everybody posting sickening holiday couple pics and I'm over here deepthroating a bottle of whiskey.
I'm so happy for you. But I still have to shave because a woman has needs and this woman needs an orgasm.
She was doing drunken zumba and screaming "FUCK YOU I HAVE MY OWN STYLE!" at the TV
Randomize