i just borrowed 5 dollars from my eight year old sister. i'm at a new low
I thought you said his peep was too small
it is but i have no money and nothing is on tv until 7 when americas next top model comes on.
Where the fuck is Rob at, he hasnt answered his phone in like 2 weeks.
Dude Rob died 2 weeks ago wtf?
Holy shit r u serious? How?
Just kidding, but im pretty sure he boned your gf and doesnt want to talk to you.
just had to take a 4 hour nap to write a one page paper. its obviously the week after winter break.
She crushed my hand with the box spring last time, so it's all good.
Just came during my obgyn appt. I need to get laid.
Exactly. So you're exempt under the "I can't just fuck her to make it go away" clause of 2010.
He just kept repeating "not with an octopus" over and over for hours. Soooooo Porn Dare was a succes.
The drag queen we did coke with is going to be on Ru Paul's drag race. I feel so proud.
I can't get over how you look like his sister and he wants to fuck you.
I think I'm crying more because after all these years he never learned to spell you or use a comma properly from me
Yeah well you try taking nice pictures while you have pizza crust lodged in your throat
I just tried to get a motorcycle cop to give me a ride....he told me not to ask strangers for rides
He gave me a box of cheez-its after sex, does that make me a hooker?
Just went to Meijer. Purchased furnace filters, fishing line, red lipstick and pregnancy test. And if my purchase alone wasn't classy enough, I took the pregnancy test in the Meijer bathroom because Im on my way to the bar and wanted to know if that was a good idea or not. Cheers to no babies!
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