What's proper 1 nite stand etiquette?
Say hi to his dad and make him some breakfast.
You are the one person I know will appreciate this- and I'm aware that its nearly 5 am- but I have 3 words... G spot orgasm. BE JEALOUS
The pickup line "You look exactly like my sister" would only work in Arkansas...SCORE!!
So I decided to put different foods on my dick to see which would feel the best
and??
Cake is only good when you eat it
beer for lunch on the first day back to school.... too soon?
My mom asked me if I was being satisfied, sexually. And then discussed positioning.
I cagt a turtle and named him squirt. He's in my bathtub Caleb is feeding me peaches! This is the most beautiful vodka Thursday ever!
He told me he wanted to show me something beautiful, then just started peeing off the bridge into oncoming traffic
me blowing you awake is the exact turn i want our relationship to take
Before we rave about the healing powers of your penis, remember it nearly killed me as well.
the good news is that even if it's Alex's, I can still say it's Colin's, because the kid will come out ginger anyway!
who knew there'd be a plus side to your ginger fetish one day?
I'm driving home wearing one sock, boxers, and a tee shirt. That's how good it was
Glass of stolen champagne in a to go cup = tastiest hangover cure ever
Well that didn’t go as expected.
I mean, it ended in you giving each of them a blowjob, so it kinda did.
i feel like the girl with kaleidoscope eyes except the kaleidoscopes are sparkly butt plugs
Randomize
