Shit sorry. Maybe I wont give you this sweet ass fanny pack I found in my parents attic
He doesn't know I'm infertile yet, that's when the sex gets good
Karaoke into a bottle of boones. dear summer in alabama, glad to see you again.
while we were making out your friend starting kissing my toes and all you had to say was "just go with it"
Definately laid on the floor of the shower this morning drinking the water as it fell on me.
My life now consists of 2 time frames. BV before vibrator and AD after death of my sex life.
Im 95% ready to shit behind 711
Did you get any last night. I need to track my forever aloneness
Well tech shes born nov 12, but since her head was out on the 11th, she claims both days as her birthday
So, seriously. How does it feel to know that you're riding a cock that was in kindergarten when you were going to prom?
A gay guy went down on me in the club bathroom and then fixed my makeup for me
its gonna be a great night
I'm going to fix your towel rack. I broke it while I was dancing on it.
Dude respond to my evite. You're either coming to the orgy or not.
How are you feeling?
I mean, shattered dignity aside, not bad.
Do you remember when you first moved into my parents house with me and we came home to find that my dad bolted the headboard to the wall
Randomize
