ugh, i have officially sinned in all of my cute clothes. i can't even wear any of them without feeling regret.
Well whatever you do have, it sure worked on me.
A Penis?
Nothing says true friendship like 2 people bonding over potentially having AIDS.
double majoring has taught me only that psych majors are sluttier than govt majors
I usually would've stopped there but I kinda remember opening the bottle of vodka, and we ALL know that's when things go downhill.
i looked up and she was looking over the stall watching me pee and told me to unlock the door. that dedicated to sucking my dick.
All you need to know is that isn't jizz
Friends don't brand friends with cigars. It's not how it works.
I'll pretend I don't know she's blind, my morals claimed the back seat in this adventure.
I've made a single handle of rum last like three weeks and my mom hasn't even acknowledged it.
Literally had sex in his grow room under a plant.. ganja queen .
ya I went to the grocery store literally just for cheese and condoms
ugffhh I have work in 4 hours and have recieved zero sleep, seeing that I'm trapped in the arms of a snoring bear man. can't. breathe. lost in the forestry of his chest hair.
well you did quote socrates while playing beer pong and then proceeded to fall down
I did not shave my legs to sit at home and diddle myself. He better wake the fuck up and put the fear of god in me!
Randomize