By the way the awkward moment from yesterday is now a bad situation I have to figure out.
Thank you Grey Goose.
I wish life was like dora the explorer where dancing pigs appear out of nowhere to solve your problems for you
i just keep taking vicodin and supergluing random shit
Only I could do what I did last night and feel perfectly ok working around children the next day
Clusterfucked is a frowned upon word in work related emails
there is no amount of schooling that prepares you for when your morbidly obese 45 year old patient tells you she has her clit pierced.
When i'm home next we need to get baked and go to waffle house. I want to see if the waitress can still guess my intoxication level and what i'm about to order before i even make it to the table.
We have to have sex twice when i get back. I miss you sex, and thank god the nhl lockout is over sex. I will happily let you wear your sharks jersey during it and i will wear my ducks jersey, and it will be mad rivalry sex.
I am seriously thinking about wearing a blanket as a cape. So when I pass out tonight the blanket might keep me warm.
Pretty sure that propositioning you to fly across the country for sex fest '13 isn't something my husband would approve of.
I think I just gave my niece a weed pinata...
Somehow she talked me into getting my dick pierced, weird first date.
The hint wasn't even a hint. it said "stop talking to her" that's pretty straightforward
Free stuff before I even put his balls in my mouth like wow great start
His phone started ringing when we were pulled over and he said 'hold on, this is most likely more important than you', proceeded to answer it and agree to work sunday, then hung up, looked at the cop and told him to continue.
Randomize
