I bet they all look and smell like Amy Winehouse
I know...I feel like disliking her as a person on facebook
We aren't going to mix hockey and sex texts tonight.
I totally agree. all sexting is on hold till after the games over.
Playoffs. This shit is serious.
I'm having a self conscious moment and I need your complete honest opinion of my boobs.
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I legit had to pull him off my car. Then he texted me saying 'take me places.' Shotgun getting that drunk tonight
Woke up this morning with a junior police officer sticker over my nipple this morning.
Our sex has gotten so much better since we broke up.
I tried to convince the Lobo Card people to take my pic with my sunglasses on because I will probably always be this hungover.
Your dad just texted me? He said I needed to holler at him when I get up tomorrow. I honestly thought you had somehow gone to jail.
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Dinner was cheetos vodka and whiskey. This is what happens when even your booty call breaks up with you.
I don't know if I'm more excited about getting chipotle or about getting laid
I just got back like 5 minutes ago, I have two champagne bottles that I carried with me on the train home and a Dunkin donuts coffee cup full of stolen butter, I've been in a windowless room for the last 6 hours, time does not exist
what is your life
Free champagne that's what
honestly performing my own hysterectomy would hurt less than my cramps right now.
Are you telling me right now that the weed man sexted you?
THE WEED MAN SEXTED ME!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
I think my liver just tried to kill me, we need to slow down
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