Excuse me do you have gonnorhea?
Stop it. You sound like you're giving birth.
she gave up head for lent, but she said sex was still fair game
she said, and i quote, "i want to black out with my rack out"
Drunken horseback riding is the absolute worst decision i've ever made in my life.
It's my fault there's ramen coiled around his penis.
What part of i'm handcuffed to an oven do you not understand?
Its not low standards. We're more of like a self esteem camp for average girls
Between the walk of shame, bar fight, karaoke, injuries, number of bar check-ins, and variety/quantity of alcohols and Advil consumed, I'd say HookerFest 2012 was a raging success.
I just told him that with every paper, I'd take a picture of myself with one less piece of clothing. Who say's I can't be a tutor?
You yelled to anyone that tried to help you "I have a burrito, what else could a girl want?"
He went down on me to the national anthem being sung by Jordan sparks. It was very patriotic of him
By the time I realized I was watching a Danish porno with muppets it was already too late
You are currently doing Harry Potter spells with the turkey-baster...
I don't want to hook up with him sober. That's pretty much like saying I love you.
Randomize
