Enough with studying for finals. Time to put that my little pony coloring book to use.
Making out with married ex girlfriends: priceless
its good she wears the same dress to all the weddings so we can track how fat she's really gotten
so glad i banged her when she was skinny
if i hurry i can finally have sex while stoned off my ass
godspeed.
i just put a booger in my mom's hair and i just needed to tell someone.
Go ahead. I tried to back up ur budhism story but she mite be catching on
Dammit. I hoped that would work. Just tell her I'm doing my pilgrmidge to Nepal or something.
I am at the point where deciding not to drink alone is worth a rocky music montage in and of itself.
Do you think drinking vodka, rum and sourpuss out of a water bottle, in a class that isn't even mine rude?
I'm so high that I'm intently watching my neighbor move his car back and forth in order to put his motorcycle in the garage, and getting irritated that it seems so complicated.
Currently hot boxing a fort I made on our snow day... This is legendary
I'm experimenting with sincerity
Just a couple of adults talking about cum shots at 8am on presidents day
There are twenty eight units in that building. There has to be at least one heterosexual in it. You can't have fucked your way through all of it.
That’s the third time this month he’s hooked up with a girl by telling her it’s his bachelor party, and he’s not even dating a chick let alone engaged.
At some point i am going to say to you "i have this really bad idea! You in? " just go with it.
Randomize
