i'm in his bathroom *freshening up* and he not only has a hairdryer... but a straightener. get me out of here... NOW
I just ate a whole bag of celery instead of getting up to get a glass of water. That high.
she ate the whole pudding cup using only her tongue. i'm considering going lesbian for her
she played "i just wanna get married" by jagged edge while we were having sex. why cant i avoid stage 5 clingers
Count me out. I seem to have semen induced blindness in one eye.
friends don't put videos of other friends on youtube puking on their professor on the first day
I think I might be drunk enough to cut my own hair
I'm pretty sure I did the Macarena with a gay guy while shot gunning a beer
He only likes me when I'm naked and I don't like being around him clothed. It's the perfect relationship.
Peeling duct tape off of my dick is definitely one of the stranger sensations that I've experienced.
I mean I'm not gay but a hundred bucks is a hundred bucks
Do it break your family into faction start a civil war
If we were teenagers we would intentionally be trying to burn down this historic landmark
Your heart isn't making stupid decisions... your penis is outsmarting your brain. Stop fucking her!
I'll pick u up. I have to buy a new sofa cover anyway. I swear I've never seem a girl cum like that before.
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