I woke up naked this morning and I found out that I thought I was Adam last night and Eve was my wife so I ran naked saying I was in the Garden of Eden and I could shit wherever I wanted.....too bad the garden was in my friends apt.......I spent the morning cleaning and have reached a new low
no, i'm proud of you. this is the happiest you've been since you discovered that bowls can be used as cups if you don't feel like washing dishes.
some guy just pulled a dress out of a fax machine...I have no idea what the hell is going on
The gay viking and his eqyptian 'queen' hooked up on our couches. They pushed them together to make a bed. Innovative, but awkward to come home from work to at 7 am.
Basically I don't wanna put on pants...but I'm stoked for drinking my face off tomorrow.
Dude it's huge. I don't usually like looking at those things, but you're kind of forced to stare that horse in the face.
Love you too. There are very few people I let pee in my dishwasher.
Did you really get 12 corn dogs from the gas station last night?
seriously though if NH has the largest penis size... the rest of America must be very disappointed.
I couldn't stop laughing at the fact he was cutting lines with a sears card. What 24 year old has a sears card?
Honestly I am too high to watch videos of you jerking off right now
I'm going to confession for the first time in 6 years. Where do I start, the gay sex or rampant alcoholism?
He was my first marine! I wanna remember his name!
I just saw a guy faceplant off a unicycle while holding a saxophone, while his buddy riding another unicycle and sporting a flute rode by laughing
Only at UConn...
Nothing like having a family watch you dry heave at the end of the dock
Randomize
