Running into every girl no one would hook up with here at rick's. Typical.
So I went into my gym pretty wasted and asked the trainer guy if i could order a cock meat sandwich. Needless to say, I'm canceling my membership tomorrow.
he threw mangos from the tree he was in at people and got arrested for harassment
Dude I think you forgot how to talk last night. We kept asking if you wanted a condom and you just smiled and made weird noises...
You pointed at his crotch then made a thrusting motion. I think it's safe to say every guy at my college loves you.
all you kept saying from the spare room was "can you bring me a puke bowl...and the cat"
Well, there goes the no drunk sex injuries resolution.
Nah its cool some of my cousins have fucked the same girls and brought them on family vacations and everything.
Every time I think about it I can feel His toe in my mouth and I gag, I'm scarred for life.
You had the nerve to crowd surf to your own bedroom.. I guess watching Aladdin high was probably the best idea ever
On the 3rd day, she mixed sangria and orange juice and saw that it was good.
She was rubbing her face on the carpet, she was high.
Dude. Woke up this morning wearing that chick's panties. 8/10, would recommend. I love tequila.
I realized just how much my daughter is MINE when I heard her tell someone "Go shit yourself" yesterday.
Damn, I just did coke with a dude in a bathroom and after he took his dick out right in front of me and took a piss. What a power move.
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